Become A Player

Have Great Conversations With Women

This is the first of a series I will be writing over the next few weeks for the Way of the Player community revolving around.. You guessed it. Having great conversations with beautiful women.

One of the most common things that I come across in the members of our community is that they are worried about not having anything to say when they approach women. They worry that they will run out of things to say and they will look like an idiot. This is amazing. With the millions of thoughts that you have every day racing around your head, in the one instance when you need them to work for you, they seize up and disappear from your consciousness leaving you naked in the spotlight.

How on Earth does that happen? How can we suddenly be lost for words when most of the time we have an absolute abundance of them, why do they abandon us when we need them most?

Fight Flight Response

If any of you have ever studied psychology, then you would know about a condition called the ‘Fight Flight Response’, here is a video that explains this.

Essentially, when we encounter a perceived threat, we send a chemical signal to a very primitive part of our brain known as the ‘Amygdala’. This is the part of the brain which is responsible for fear and when stimulated it puts the body and mind in an alert state.

An alert state? But shouldn’t that mean that our brains should be more alert? Surely this would be a good thing for conversation? Unfortunately no.

When our bodies and minds enter this state we divert energy resources from areas which are considered to be non-essential for our immediate survival. For any of you Trekkies reading this, it’s kind of like when the Starship Enterprise takes a hit and they need to divert all energy to the force-field and thrusters in order to escape the threat and survive. The parts of your brain responsible for conversation are among the first to go because your Amygdala has decided that this not as important in this time of threat as your sense of smell, hearing, sight, reflexes etc. Your primitive brain takes over and that is why you can’t think of anything to say.

You might be thinking, well that’s pretty useless in this day and age isn’t it; why is my body sabotaging me, doesn’t my biological imperative demand that I get laid? It does indeed, but fear is a very powerful emotion and one that has kept your ancestors alive up until this point. It wouldn’t have done your Great-Great-Great-Great-Great-(yep that’s far enough, you can’t prove me wrong)-Grandfather any good if he had tried to talk a pack of wolves out of eating him for dinner. He had to run and run really really fast in order to get home to your Great-Great-Great-Great-Great-Grandmother and make your Great-Great-Great-Great-Grandfather. The Amygdala is why you are here today.

The Conversation Fix

So we have identified the problem, we now know that we are biologically hardwired to sabotage our conversations every time we put ourselves in a fearful situation, now lets look at some solutions.

Lets face it, approaching beautiful strangers can be scary. There is no harm in admitting it to yourself, you are not alone, most men feel this way to varying extents. Obviously you will be able to have better conversations when you are relaxed and not afraid, but it’s no easy task to just stop being afraid because it’s something that we really have very little control over.

From years of teaching men how to approach and attract beautiful women, I can promise you, the only way to get rid of that fear is to go out and confront that fear time and time again, no amount of ‘seduction material’ will fix that for you, only experience. This community exists to support you on your journey to Become a Player. We can’t make these breakthroughs for you, your participation is required. However, one thing that we can do for you is give you some tools to help you in your journey, and I am going to give you one such tool now.

Make Them Talk

The number one complaint that I get from women is, why don’t guys ever listen to me? Women love to talk about themselves and this is wonderful, because it means that we don’t have to worry so much about trying to find something to say, all we need to do is ask the right questions and they will do our talking for us.

This way it doesn’t matter how scared or nervous we are feeling because we wont have to worry about saying something insightful or interesting all we need to do is listen. You could be literally about to shit yourself and they probably wouldn’t realize because you just asked them if they are here for a special occasion and they are busy telling you all about it.

“Are you having a good night?”

“Yes”

“Okay”

This is where most guys go wrong, they ask ‘closed ended questions’. Closed ended questions are question that don’t go anywhere, there is generally a yes or no answer and as soon as they have answered you need to think of another question to ask them, this is a bad habit.

“I like your earrings, is there a story behind those?”

“Not really, I actually just got them from Diva, they are probably cheap knockoffs”

“Oh really, what makes you think that?”

“Because everything they sell is”

These are open ended questions, they generally lead to a conversation, and you don’t actually need to say much about yourself at all in order to have a conversation, she is doing most of the work for you and all you need to do is listen and use the last thing she said to generate a new question. After awhile of this, you should feel more relaxed, and the conversation part of your brain will start working again. It’s that simple.

Take the pressure off yourself and put it on her. This is a great way for beginners to become good conversationalists and form some good habits for life. More importantly this will help get you the experience that you need to become a master socialiser and seducer.

By Kieran Black

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Get involved in the community, we won’t bite! Click Here

The post Great Conversations – Why You Can’t Think Of Anything To Say appeared first on Way of the Player - Become a Player.

Become A Player

Attract Beautiful Women By Taking Cold Showers

Cold showers have been scientifically proven to improve multiple aspects of our physical and mental health. The ancient samurai warriors used to pour buckets of cold river water on their heads every morning in a Shinto practice called Misogi. This was a purification ritual on a spiritual level. They believed that it cleansed their spirit and helped them start a new day & new adventure fresh. The Spartans You know those Ripped up scarlet cape wearing soldiers from the movie 300) felt warm water was for the weak and unmasculine. The original James Bond stories noted that he would begin his showers warm and end them with a few minutes of cold water.

In the 1820s, a German farmer named Vincenz Priessnitz started touting a new medical treatment called “hydrotherapy,” which used cold water to cure everything from broken bones to erectile dysfunction. He turned his family’s homestead into a sanitarium, and patients flocked to it in the hope that his cold water cure could help them. Among his clientele were dukes, duchesses, counts, countesses, and a few princesses to boot.

Many cultures throughout history have used cold showers to improve multiple aspects of their lives. Here in this new aged lifestyle, we’ve become to comfortable with the luxury of Hot Showers that we have forgot some of our ancient practices that have provided great overall benefits to our well-being.

Benefits of Cold Showers

Weight Loss/ Brown Fat:

People who take cold showers experience an increase in brown fat cells, which protect from aging; fight obesity, diabetes, and heart disease

Brown fat = special fat cells that have, unlike white fat cells, high concentrations of mitochondria and, therefore, are able to generate heat without any muscular activity. Brown fat concentrations are very high in new borns and infants, but gradually decline with age due to an absence of cold stimulation in the general population.

Brown fat cells burn glucose in an attempt to create as much heat energy as possible. A higher ammount of these cells within the body will lead to more energy being burned per second, meaning more unnecessary weight being released from the body. Many people within our culture today have been seeking to improve that rate of their metabolism because it means that every process within the body will become more efficient  causing more weight to be released and more growth/restoration of muscle tissue to occur.

Strengthens Immunity

Cold showers are sometimes touted as a preventative tonic for colds, flu, and infections. An experiment in Prague studied the effect of cold water immersions on athletic young men. They immersed themselves in water at 14°C (57°F), three times a week for six weeks. Among many changes, they saw increased levels of two types of white blood cells: monocytes and lymphocytes. While certain lymphocytes are instrumental in eliminating bacteria, viruses, and toxins; monocytes are indirectly responsible for the engulfing and consuming of pathogens and foreign materials. Researchers believe that the increased metabolic rate, which results from the body’s attempt to warm itself up, activates the immune system and releases more white blood cells in response. Therefore, it is reasonable to assume that people who take regular cold showers are less likely to develop colds, flu’s, and even some forms of cancer.

Clear Radiant Skin

When you shower with warm water, it opens up your pores. Then you wash and this cleans up your pores. That’s all good. When you end, it would be best to close your pores and cold water does just that. It’s good to close your pores after you are all cleaned up because it will prevent the pores from being easily clogged by dirt and oil, which causes skin imperfections such as acne for example. Another benefit is that cold water makes your blood vessels constrict which reduces swelling and the appearance of dark circles under your eyes (where skin is at its thinnest). This provides you with a young, healthy glow.

Shiny healthy Hair

Cold water makes your hair look healthier and shinier. As a matter of fact, cool air makes your hair shinier too (that’s why there is a cool air button on your hair dryer). What the cold water does is that it closes the cuticle which makes the hair stronger and prevents dirt from easily accumulating within your scalp. Basically, the same principle with how it closes the pores of your skin as mentioned above. Stronger hair, of course, prevents hair from being easily pulled out when you are combing, and it helps in slowing down overall hair loss.

Kills Depression

Cold showers release chemicals into the body to decrease stress, anxiety, and genuinely just make you feel happier. A cold shower will wake up the body, mind, spirit, and you will be fully prepared to take on whatever challenges the day will set before you.

Increase Of Testosterone

With male testosterone at an all time low (which could be due to all the soy intake that’s going today. Soy turns male testosterone into estrogen; which is why many men who drink and eat soy often experience a flabby woman like chest. Check underneath the ingredients label on your favorite foods, you’ll be surprised how many of them say Contains: Soy Ingredients) cold showers are a great way to give your body a natural boost of testosterone without using those new testosterone injects and creams. Cold water will increase testosterone and the libido; not only does one’s sex increase, but so does one’s overall strength and energy levels.

Save You Time/Money

As we are all aware of, the price of oil is on the rise and by taking cold showers you are not only saving yourself money but you are preserving one of the earths most valuable resources. Also if you take a cold shower you won’t be spending unnecessary time standing under warm water in comfort, inhaling toxic fumes from the evaporated chlorine and fluoride in the water. So if you won’t take colder showers for yourself, at least do it for humanitarian reasons.

More Benefits

Cure For Insomnia.

Cold showers calm the mind and body so intensely that one will often find himself sleeping like a baby after taking a cold shower at night.

Regulates temperature (Meaning there will be no more chronically cold hands or feet, or excessive sweating).

Improves kidney function.

Strengthens the parasympathetic and sympathetic nervous systems.

Contracts the muscles to eliminate toxins and poisonous wastes.

Strengthens the mucous membranes, which help resist hay fever, allergies, colds, coughs.

Brings blood to the capillaries, therefore increasing circulation throughout the body.

Improves hormonal activity.

I have personally been taking cold showers for a little over a year now and I honestly have to say I’ve never looked or felt better in my entire life. I have this theory that if I can wake up every morning and jump into a cold shower, the toughest part of my day will already be out of the way – the rest is a breeze. Cold showers have also effected the way I deal with my nerves; being able to ignore all the mental resistance/anxiety about jumping into a cold shower is not very different to ignoring the anxiety you feel before approaching a woman. Which is why I want to invite all of you Players and Playerettes to be out there to take on the 21 Day Cold Shower Challenge  You can even track your progress and relate to others who are during the same challenge within the Player Chronicle section of the forums. I would also advise taking before and after pictures so you can see the significant changes within your hair, skin and body; not to mention you will feel absolutely amazing.

The 21 Day Cold Shower Challenge invites you on a course that can permanently change your life for the better. All that is required is for you to take two cold showers a day – One in the morning and one before bed. The first three days are always the toughest, but after that you’ll be singing tunes and dancing around in the cold water like a true champ.

I’m looking forward to reading about your results…Peace & Love

By Eddie Fews

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For Consultation or Consultation Via Instant Messenger or Skype Email me at EddieFews@Wayoftheplayer.com and I will get back to you within 48 hours.

The post Cold Shower Your Way To Beautiful Women appeared first on Way of the Player - Become a Player.

Become A Player

For some strange reason many of you so called “Players” out there think you’re going to reach a level where you no longer feel nerves or anxiety. The odd part of this is you think you are going accomplish this by reading tons material on the internet.

So that’s the plan?

You’re going to read every article on Way of The Player 10 times each and every butterfly floating around in your tummy will vanish? Well… I’m sorry to break it to you fellas, but you can kiss that theory goodbye. Last time I checked nerves and anxiety were natural human emotions felt by all of us and until science reaches the level where they can extract specific emotions from our DNA its just going to be something we have to deal with.

But continue reading, because there is some good news. The good news is you will become better at dealing with and handling your anxiety over time. However that is NOT going to happen if all you do is read articles on Way Of The Player. We appreciate every visitor and member of the website, but reading this material is NOT enough. Way of the player is full of great stories and information that will certainly give you an edge over the guys trail an erroring their way through this whole thing. But, reading and just reading will never be good enough. You MUST get out there, push through those silly nerves and take action. And this is why in our Ebook ” The Player Handbook” that will be available by the end of this month we’ve designed a step by step 30 day plan that will get you out of your shell and into the action.

We all have our demons and some of us allow our demons to regulate our choices. Others choose fight the demons and choose to operate from the position of us that wants to be great, the part of us that wants success. Nervousness and anxiety are nothing but your own demons working to keep you suppressed and unsuccessful  Too many of us are losing the battle to our own selves and its about time we get sick of it – You are your own worse enemy  You know those mornings where you wake up and just don’t feel like getting out of bed to go to work? What would happen if you gave into that demon and let it win the battle against you every time?  You wouldn’t have money, clothes, food, or a place to live. You take action against that urge to stay in bed because you know you have to survive. Carry that same mentality over into your love life – View being successful with women the same as you view making money to survive. If you give into your anxiety and don’t go approach, you are staying in the bed and not going to work.

The anxiety will never fully perish; you have to fight your demons. I have approached hundreds and hundreds of women, I’ve been doing so for years, and I still get nervous before making my first approach. The only difference is now I react before the emotion has time to spread. I’ve become better at taking action anyway because my confidence “Angel” has become more influential than my anxious “demon”. When I feel nervous I now become excited because I know I am being faced with an opportunity to push myself unto the next level. And I have only become this successful by dealing with negative emotions because I have taken actions against it; not because I read a bunch of words on the internet.

In the words of the great Jay-z ” They’ve read a bunch of words, I’ve lived a bunch of life. I have made approach after approach at the times when I was trembling with fear – I fought myself- Its the one and only way. Rockstars that have been performing for years have admitted to still getting nervous right before going on stage but once they sing that first note or say that first word, the nerves all vanish. This is what will happen to you when you start pushing through your own self.

If you haven’t done so already; log onto to the Way Of The Player Forums( Click The “Forum” Tab at the top of this page) and start a journal in the “Player Chronicles” section. Its time to get up out of bed and fight your demons.

Eddie Fews

For personal instruction and 1 on 1 Consultation contact me at EddieFews@WayOfTheplayer.com

The post Fight Your Demons appeared first on Way of the Player - Become a Player.

Become A Player

Sexy People Know They Are Sexy

I hosted one of my WOTP New York Wolfpack ‘meet ups’ at a large museum in New York this weekend. Its a popular event done at the museum on the first Saturday of each month in which people from different cultures and social classes all come out to have a good time. This weekend I had the pleasure of meeting many new members of the group and I was able to learn a lot from each one of them. One member in particular had a interesting story that was inspiring to me and I’m sure it will be inspiring to you as well.

His name is Eddie – ironically and he had reached what many of us would call “Rock bottom” within his social life. He was over-weight, depressed, and when all of his “friends” canceled on his invitation to go out and party on his birthday he decided enough was enough. He went out on his own , gave it his best shot, and although he came up empty handed he had done the opposite of what many men do on a day to day basis; Eddie had even made plans to go out again on his own directly after my meetup. Eddie decided that it was time to man up and take control over his life; He began eating better, exercising, and releasing unnecessary weight.

Although I did tell Eddie during our conversation that it wasn’t the weight that was directly holding him back but it was a great decision to become healthier overall. I informed Eddie that being attractive in the eyes of women is all about believing in your own sexy. The reason overweight men have a hard time meeting women is because they have a hard time accepting themselves. Our society is flooded with images of the men who get women having chiseled Abs and rock hard biceps  So as players we have to understand that the people who place these pictures in the public eye are the people who want you to buy their protein powders and sign up for their gym. I know plenty of fat guys who pull in some decent ass, so don’t let your current physical state deter you from trying to score. Anyone who thinks you need to be in perfect shape to get with women doesn’t know anything about them. A woman falls more in love with what she hears than what she sees.

We all as men need to take control over our lives; lets stop blaming any factors other than our own lack of ambition. Its no ones fault but your own that women don’t find you attractive. Nines times out of ten the good looking guy you see with an attractive girl didn’t get with her just because he’s attractive. He got with her because he believed in his own sexy; women have to find him attractive because he finds himself attractive  He looks in the mirror, smiles at himself and tells himself that he’s sexy regardless of his looks. Guys that see me with sexy women will always say things like “Well, you got with her because you’re a good looking and cool man”. NO, I got with her because I wasn’t afraid to try; I got her because I was courageous enough to make the attempt despite the little nerves I felt bubbling in my gut, I got with her because deep down in my heart I know I deserve the highest of quality of everything that life has to offer.

Is there anything that you’re good at that you are the slightest bit arrogant about? Of course there is; because you’re a Player and Players perfect multiple aspects of their lives. Now its time to get so good at being you that you become arrogant about it. I’m arrogant because I am an expert at being me; no one could be better than me, it’s just not possible. I’m there greatest ‘Eddie Fews’ on the planet and if anyone had the opportunity to live in my body for a day they wouldn’t be able to keep up – I just know me to well.

The greatest professional athletes on the planet all have some level of arrogance when it comes to their talents; it is this raw, often misunderstand belief in themselves that drives them to success. Take control over your life and be the greatest YOU possible. Eddie from the story above went out on his own because he has no one to go out with. Do you have the same drive? That’s the drive that leads to greatness and until you take great leaps forward you can never be great. Stop moping, stop making excuses, and stop complaining; there are too many beta males, its about time you join a new team – Here is where the Players are.

By Eddie Fews

EddieFews@wayoftheplayer.com

The post Believe In Your Sexy appeared first on Way of the Player - Become a Player.

Become A Player

Hey guys!

Some of you may have noticed that we haven’t updated the blog in awhile and I just want to let you know, it’s not because we have run out of awesome things to discuss, it’s just that we have been super busy perfecting our new book which should be coming out in a couple of weeks. Very exciting stuff.

This article addresses a rather uncomfortable truth which all Players need to face at some point. That some of our friends, who we love, may actually be holding us back from getting where we need to in life.

The thought of abandoning friendships is never a nice one, naturally we are quite loyal and attached to our friends, we have been through a lot with them and we are comfortable with them. But is that a good enough reason to keep them in our lives when we know that they are anchoring us in our old selves when we are trying to become our new selves?

Personally, I think not, but I’ll let you decide for yourself.

Who Do You Want To Be?

Have you ever noticed that successful people tend to be friends with other successful people?

In fact. It is highly unusual for someone successful to hang around with losers… Coincidence? I think not.

There is a saying that goes “It’s not what you know, it’s who you know”. There is a lot of truth to this. However, many people assume that this statement means, “Life is unfairly biased towards popular people and no matter how skilled I might be, people are superficial and this gives me a disadvantage in life”. Wrong.

Life is indifferent to how many friends you have or what advantages you may have been born with. Life rewards people who take control and create opportunities instead of feeling entitled to them.

If you don’t know the people that you need to know to get ahead in life, then that is your fault. You are not a victim of circumstance, you are not a victim at all. If you don’t know the right people, it’s because you haven’t proactively sought them out and befriended them.

Many people are under the illusion that a friendship is something that developed out of a mutually shared interest and all things are equal in that relationship (or else they should be) but what we forget is that in most of these cases there was one person who was more interested in developing a friendship than the other, and that person courted the other person until they became friends.

There was give and take of course, but in a very similar way to how a sexual relationship might develop. There are dates, there is intimacy, there is affection. You seduced some of your friends and they seduced you. That certainly doesn’t mean that you want to have sex with your friends, it just reflects the true nature of how relationships develop.

Recognizing this truth, should allow you to understand that you can seek out friendships with people who are more likely to help you get ahead in life but you will probably need to seduce them first, in much the same way you would seduce a beautiful woman.

If you wanted to become a great Actor, then you would greatly improve your chances of becoming a great actor if you surrounded yourself around people who were already great actors. If you wanted to become a great Player, then you should surround yourself around people who are already great Players. It’s as simple as that.

Upgrading Your Friendship Circle

You like your friends, of course you do; but the fact that you are still reading this tells me that your current friends are not such a good fit for the lifestyle that you want.

Do you need to tell your friends that it’s not working out, that you need to ‘see other people’?

No. We’re not going to go that far, that would just be weird. But, you should start thinking about how much you spend with them and what you normally achieve during that time and when you start making new friends that are more in line with the lifestyle you want, how comfortable would you feel introducing these friends to your current friends?

If you think they would embarrass you, then there is obviously something dysfunctional about your social life at the moment.

One of the hardest things about becoming a Player is letting go of who we used to be. Despite how much we know we could be doing better in life, we still feel relatively safe and comfortable in our old lives and failure is always the most readily available option. But failure is an seductive temptation that we can never allow ourselves to give into, because there is nothing sadder than a failed life.

Part of letting go of who we once were will also mean letting go of many of the things we were most attached to, but it is only in letting go and being free of our previous attachments that we can be born anew and unhindered by our past selves.

The friends that you hang out with will ultimately define who you are as a person and how you see yourself. If your friends don’t inspire you, if they don’t challenge you, if they are not supporting you 100% in your quest to become the greatest man that you can be, then you can do better, and you must do better if you want to have the things that you want most out of life.

Choose your friends based on the kind of life you want to lead.

By Kieran Black

The post You Are Your Friends appeared first on Way of the Player - Become a Player.

Become A Player

Are You A Player?

We would like to invite you to complete a quiz which will assess your skills and knowledge as a Player.

These questions have been carefully crafted and selected by the team at ‘Way of the Player’, to provide you with an accurate measure of how you are progressing as a Player.

It is not easy to obtain a high score because we have naturally set the standard quite high. As Players it’s important that we aim high because life is too short to waste in mediocrity.

Challenge Yourself To Get 100%

This quiz has been designed so you can do it more than once and you can get 100% but because many of the questions relate to what you do in real-life and your attitude towards life, you will actually need to make some real life changes in order to score 100% on the Player Quiz (Or you could always just cheat but that wouldn’t really help you much would it?)

In addition to being a Player Quiz, this is also a checklist that provides you with clear direction on how to improve yourself in the areas that you fall short in. If you can fix your life so that you answer all of these questions correctly then you will be living an amazing life full of beautiful women and adventure, we guarantee it.

Share And Discuss Your Results

If you get a less than desired result on the Player Quiz, then use the Player Forum, to share and discuss your results with others.

Feel free to challenge a question, if you feel that it was wrong or unfair. We welcome the discussion and our members will be more than happy to assist you in understanding the Way of the Player philosophy.

To go to the quiz page click here.

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Become A Player

My Friends Predicament

Just recently I was having a conversation with a good friend of mine by the name of ‘Daniel’ and we were discussing the most recent falling out he had with a girl he began dating.

He called me to explain the situation to me and we concluded that he was giving too much of himself away to the girl too soon. He hadn’t left space for her to invest in him emotionally, physically, mentally, or even financially; and because he was giving and not receiving(or even cared about receiving) he was sub-communicating to the girl that she was more valuable then he was; thus she began to lose attraction for him.

I may catch some slack for this, but what I explained to Daniel is, ‘it is important that women are giving more into the interaction than he is.’ Ultimately it is the “Man” that will carry the woman into the future, therefore for her to be deserving of such a fate, she had better begin to offer more of herself.

As the “man” in the relationship I am all for paying for our outings but I will always make a point or two to have the woman I am out with pay for something; less expensive of course. If we’re out for a day at the movies I’ll say something along the lines of “ I’ll buy the tickets, you buy the popcorn”. Sure I can afford the price of the popcorn, tickets, and then some, but it is important that I know the women I am out with is willing to make an “investment” of some sort.

It shows that she’s giving, caring, and willing to support me if I ever needed her to.

I remember when I was having this similar conversation with an old girlfriend of mine. I told her “I don’t mind paying for everything, in fact I will, but it’s important to a man to know that his woman would be ‘willing’ to do so.”

Feminism vs. Reality

I know this is contradictory to the popular feminist culture we live in today but it is the nature of the woman to be the supporter of the man. It is deep rooted in the core of true feminist; so as the man if I am going to be a woman’s foundation, protector, and provider it is important to me that I make sure any woman I am with is holding up her end of the bargain.

I understand that I gave financial examples above, but financial investment is the least of your worries. Finical investment is just a tangible example that is easy for both ends to understand. Women must be willing to give to you without any expectation of receiving anything in return; which is why when my girl is on her period that becomes “Blow Job” week.

Women should want to please their man and men should want to please their women, we just have different ways of achieving this. This discussion is not attacking the fundamentals of equality between men and women but rather, it is addressing the differences and sex specific investments that both men and women bring to the table.

So to the future and current players out there, when you are dealing with women make sure their investments are “Clear”. If you feel you are investing more than she is into the relationship there is a strong chance she doesn’t have the respect for you that it would take for either of you to be fulfilled in a relationship.

In David Deida’s book “ Way Of The Superior Man” he clearly states that a mans course in life is fulfillment of his soul purpose, and a woman’s course in life is to find fulfillment within a relationship. This again makes it clear that a “girlfriend/Wife” will never be the complete source of your happiness but should support you in finding and achieving your ultimate purpose in life whatever that may be.

Beautiful women are not pets that you need to feed luxury items and expensive dinners to or else they run away; you can certainly do these things but if you are a self respecting man you will expect your women to earn that treatment by supporting and pleasing you any way that she can. It’s not an unreasonable expectation, it’s actually quite realistic as I know a lot of men who have these kinds of relationships.

Be true to yourself and your dreams, look for a partner in the women that you meet and love and not just somewhere warm and moist to put your dick. You can have that ideal woman, but ultimately she will be a product of your own behavior and attitude towards her and the relationship.

By Eddie Fews

For inquiries and consultation email me: EddieFews@wayoftheplayer.com

The post The Role Women Play In Our Lives appeared first on Way of the Player - Become a Player.

Become A Player

Whenever my girlfriend and I go running or walking in our local park, I always make a point of saying hello to the people that we pass.

My girlfriend always put this down to one of my many idiosyncrasies (funny habits) and for awhile she didn’t make any mention of it; until the other day when I said hello to a man who looked like he was obviously not in the mood to be friendly with anyone.

My girlfriend says to me “Why did you say hello to that guy, you could just tell by looking at him that he wasn’t going to say hello back”

To which I replied, “I don’t need to get a ‘hello’ back to make it worthwhile, what’s important to me is that ‘I’ say hello, I can’t be responsible for what other people do”

“But that guy was obviously an a$$hole, you said hello to him and all he did was scowl at you like you just lit a burning bag of dog sh!t on his front porch”

“Because those people need it the most”

Learn To Socialize Without The Need For Validation

You have probably been walking down the street or been out at one point or another and somebody has smiled at you and said hello to you on the street. At the time you might have felt shocked by this, you might have wondered why they said hello to you in particular, you might actually feel like for a moment, the world can be a pretty friendly place and is perhaps not so cold, dark and isolated as we often feel it is.

Consider the power of that gesture. One word, a simple acknowledgement which can have such a profound affect on us. That simple greeting could change someones day for the better, it could even change their life for the better.

It is something so easy to do, it takes next to no effort on our behalf and it can have such a positive affect on the world around us; so why don’t more people say hello to strangers?

We are living in an age of isolation and mistrust. We live in a world where most of us feel like we have enough friends, and every person we pass on the street could be a potential b!tch, a$$hole, slut, rapist, murderer, pedophile. We know they exist so they could be anyone, and because they could be anyone, with the wrong attitude they can become everyone.

So perhaps this is what stopped people from acknowledging every stranger and perhaps this is what caused us to become increasingly introverted, isolated and distrustful of others; we might not want to invite every stranger we see to dinner, but would it really kill us to just say hello?

It wouldn’t.

But most people know that if someone was going to murder them or do horrible things to them, then acknowledging them and saying hello, showing a small act of kindness is unlikely to provoke an attack; but is that what we really fear, or is it something else? Something petty, something selfish. Perhaps what we fear, is being kind to a stranger and not having that kindness returned. Perhaps what we fear is a simple lack of validation, we allow ourselves to feel like dorks because the people we were kind to choose not to return that same kindness.

This is nothing but insecurity.

If you are confident within yourself and you believe yourself to be a beacon of positivity and awesomeness to the world around you, then it shouldn’t matter if you get anything back. Does the sun ask the Earth for warmth?

You are not doing this for them, you can’t be responsible for their sh!tty outlook on life; you should be doing this for yourself because it adds purpose and positivity to your life and that’s an amazing reward in itself.

Socialize With A Stranger A Day

Hopefully by now I have given you something to think about, hopefully you are now thinking, “its not that hard, I could say hello to some strangers, easy peasey”, if I haven’t inspired you to do that by now then you may as well stop reading now because I’m about to give you a challenge that will be a bit trickier.

You don’t have to do this right now, if you are a naturally introverted person you might just want to start with ‘hellos’ and then work your way up to a conversation but if you are like most people, you are fully capable of having a meaningful conversation with a stranger if you apply yourself.

So here is the challenge.

Have a meaningful conversation with no less than one stranger a day for the next 30 days.

The rules

1. Your conversation MUST encompass more than hello and goodbye.

2. Sales people don’t count unless you are able to break them out of ‘work mode’ and have them talking to you like a friend.

3. Internet conversations do not count. It has to be a real-life interaction.

Ultimately you are the only one who will be policing yourself on these rules. When I set this challenge for one of my previous clients who was a computer programmer and worked odd hours; on the days that he couldn’t get out in the real world to approach and talk to strangers he would just open up the phone book, pick up a name and have a conversation with the person on the other end of the line.

You don’t have to socialize with a beautiful stranger, although you might find that more rewarding, it can be anyone you want to talk to. Maybe they are waiting in line with you at the supermarket, maybe they are sitting next to you on the train, it doesn’t matter, so long as you socialize and engage with someone on a personal level.

This challenge is all about breaking down the invisible barriers we put between ourselves and the world of people around us. The more strangers you talk to, the more you will begin to relate with the world about you and the more you will begin to like humanity as a whole.

This is my challenge, if you think you have what it takes I suggest you put up a journal on the Player Forum and that way we can give you some positive feedback as you go along.

Best of luck!

By Kieran Black

The post Socialize With A Stranger A Day appeared first on Way of the Player - Become a Player.

Become A Player

Travel Some New Horizons

Hey peeps my name is Jamal, I grew up in Wilmington, North Carolina.

For those of you who haven’t been to Wilmington, its a pretty small city with only 100 thousand people or so and its the kind of place where if you don’t get out then you’re probably going to set yourself up for a pretty boring life.

Last year at the age of 22 after reading some articles on this website and realizing that I was stuck in a rut. I realized that if I didn’t make some changes then I was going to be stuck there living a life that wasn’t mine until I was old and gray.

I quit my job, said goodbye to my friends and family and I up and moved down to Miami with nothing more than my Ford Focus and the money that I earned from working at Red Lobster.

Making The Move

I don’t know exactly why I chose Miami, I guess it was probably something to do with Dexter being one of my favorite shows and the girls there always look hot on tv. I didn’t know anyone in Miami so when I first got there I booked into a motel and started looking for apartments and work.

The first night I called my Mom and she told me that it wasn’t too late to come back and I was making a mistake, Miami is dangerous etc. and I didn’t get hardly any sleep that night but the next day I got up and I started looking for an apartment and a job. It took two weeks of applying everywhere before I got both the job and the apartment with a couple of roommates who were looking for someone new.

The guys I moved in with, one guy and one girl but not a couple, became my two best friends in Miami and I learned a lot about living from them. Like not to take life so seriously all the time and that it doesn’t have to be the weekend to go out and have fun. The job I got is just working at an ice cream shop down at South Beach,  doesn’t pay too great but it turned out to be the best because I’ve been meeting loads of girls who come up from the beach and I’ve dated quite a few girls from this. I never used to get this kind of attention working at Red Lobster.

My roomies Armando and Sylvia both work at a surf shop, how awesome is that! And they told me that next time a position there opens up they think they can score me a job there buy I’m pretty happy where I’m working now.

The reason I want to share this with you guys because it was really scary at the time but I think it’s the greatest thing I ever did because now I’m feeling more happy and alive than I have in years. So if your living in your Mom’s basement, working the same dead end job and life is boring, then its no wonder you don’t have hot babes hanging off your arm because I didn’t either until I started actually LIVING and now I have way more babes than ever before just because I changed my lifestyle and my zip code.

So go travel some new horizons, take a chance. I don’t have a plan, I’m just making it up as I go along and that’s how I roll and you can too.

Keep it real Playa!

By WOTP reader Jamal

If you have anything you would like to share and have published, send it in to editor@wayoftheplayer.com

The post New Horizons appeared first on Way of the Player - Become a Player.

Become A Player

Do you fear rejection?

Are you afraid of trying and failing?

I’m about to tell you two ways that you can make sure that you NEVER get rejected ever again. It is not a strategy it’s not a technique, it is just reality and out of these two options that I present you, one will lead to you having a happy fulfilling life and the other will lead to you being bitter and angry at the world around you for the rest of your foreseeable days.

Never Get Rejected Option #1

Play it safe.

If you never approach women in the first place then you will never get rejected by them. If you never put in the effort to get that promotion at work, then you will never have to experience losing out to someone better qualified to you. If you never take up a competitive sport, then you will never have to be on the losing team. If you never try to achieve anything in life, then you will never have to experience failure…

Or will you?

If you are lonely, working a dead end job with no excitement, adventure or hope in your life; have you really never failed?

Has your philosophy of ‘playing it safe’ payed off? You haven’t failed at the small things in life, the things that don’t seem to matter that much at the time, so you don’t push yourself you convince yourself it was a bad bet and the years keep on passing you by in your safe little life.

At the time it feels like nothing, no big thing. But over time, all these little things add up and all this lack of trying and therefore lack of achievement surmises to the biggest failure ever. A failure at life itself and your punishment, one of the worst kinds of torture there is. The torture of regret.

Picture yourself sitting in a nursing home, your options and opportunities have past you by and the world about you has become confusing and alien place.

You sit there bored out of your mind, your only thoughts to keep you company are filled with regretful memories of the pretty girl who made eyes at you but you didn’t talk to her, that opportunity to work your dream job that you passed up, the many adventures that presented themselves throughout your life that you missed because it wasn’t convenient or you weren’t ready. You told yourself ‘next time’, time and time again until suddenly, there were no more ‘next times’.

If you never want to get rejected then this is the easiest way to guarantee do that. But I would ask you now, is it worth it? Is that what you want for yourself, a safe life filled with mediocrity? Or a life filled with failures and successes and at the end of it, the content satisfaction that you never passed up a good opportunity to try something new and challenging.

I know which lifestyle is more likely to have you having sex with supermodels, driving expensive sports cars and living in a giant mansion, do you?

Never Get Rejected Option #2

So if you have read through option #1 and that sounds like a good option for you, then you have my deepest sympathies.

I am now going to share with you the other way to ensure that you never get rejected again and in order for you to benefit from this, I am going to ask you to keep a completely open mind and drop any cynicism you might be feeling right now because this will work for you and if you embrace this idea then it will change your life for the better.

First off, lets look at the foundation of what rejection actually is.

It’s a part of life.

The Oxford dictionary describes rejection as…

“the dismissing or refusing of a proposal, idea, etc.”

This means that when someone disagrees with your idea of things then this is a rejection. If you tell someone something is one way, and they think it is another then you are rejecting each others versions of things but do you actually feel rejected EVERY TIME  someone disagrees with your version of things or has another opinion?

Every day we have hundreds to thousands of small little rejections from the world about us. When you go to turn on the TV but it doesn’t turn on because it isn’t plugged in, your television is rejecting you. When you go to a restaurant and you order something off the menu but they tell you they have run out, then that restaurant is rejecting you. When you argue with a friend over which movie, video game, supermodel is better then your friend is rejecting you.

We get rejected all the time and we don’t realize it.

Why?

Because when we are rejected for these small things we don’t even see it as rejection we just see it as a part of day to day life and no matter what you do, you are always going to be in conflict to some degree with the environment around you, it’s just nature.

So why do we so often take a rejection to heart when it is something bigger and more important to us, like a job or a girl?

Why isn’t it so easy to shrug it off as we would all the other little inconveniences or conflicts in our lives?

The answer is quite simple. We choose to.

We make a rejection a rejection because we choose to see it that way.

Instead of just seeing rejection as a part of every day life and one of the many stepping stones to success, many of us choose to see it as a judgement of our character as a whole and we give that power by believing it.

Never Get Rejected Again

If you never want to get rejected again, then all you need to do is not accept rejection as rejection. Instead, lets see it as something else, something more positive that will lead to us getting everything we want out of life. Opportunity.

Rejection is not rejection, rejection is opportunity.

If you really succeed when you fail and you succeed when you succeed, then you are successful. No-one successful has become successful by never trying and never failing, they have become successful by accepting rejections as an opportunity for growth and further success.

It is the opportunity to learn and improve and that is all. It is not a failure if we choose to see rejection this way. If we choose to see rejection as opportunity then every rejection is a success and you will never get rejected and you will never fail again.

That is the secret, plain and simple. I have given you two options to choose from, it is up to you to choose.

By Kieran Black

If you want to get started on your journey to become a player then start here “The Player forum“ and meet hundreds of men like yourself determined to improve their lives and meet quality beautiful women.

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