It appears that in this modern day society of romance movies and love stories we get caught up in the idea that there is someone out there that is meant to “complete” us.
We all seem to be in search for “the one”, a savior, our very own personal Jesus that is going to take us from the bottom to the top by simply being in our lives. In no way am I saying that this is completely impossible, however it is highly unlikely that you are going to have a successful relationship if you first don’t know how to be without one. Women aren’t the answer to all of your problems, they aren’t the cure for your depression, and they aren’t the reason you have yet find contentment with your life.
You see long ago, before mass media has taken over and become the primary influence on all of our lives, men weren’t dependent on women for happiness. Marriage for many was just something people did. Of course there were the rare cases of finding true love, but the majority of people were forced to succumb to arranged marriages, and marriages based on exchanges for wealth. (i’ll give you my daughter for ex amount of this and that).
Men have to first become “Men” before they were even considered ready to be with someone. And now we have entered a world where people attempt to find love before they even bother finding themselves.
The most attractive thing to a woman is a man that knows who he is, has an understanding of where he is going in his life and a man that is already “happy”.
Not only does this understanding give you an air of noticeable confidence, it also creates a magnetic aura about you. People want to be around you more because they will want to be just like you. They want to know who they are, they want to have a direction in life, and these men become your followers.
This type of man doesn’t need the approval of others because he understands that his value cannot be sought out in anyone other than himself.
The truth is, if you aren’t already happy, you aren’t ready for a relationship. This is what’s causing the 55% divorce rate we are dealing with today. Every other couple is getting divorced and no one is stopping to ask why.
Before I became an active pursuer of my purpose and identity, I dealt with many troubled relationships. I would constantly start something and never bother finishing it. I used to begin searching for myself intensely, and women would find this extremely attractive.
I would then end up in a relationship with who I would think was “the one” countless amounts of times. The only issue was, the moment I landed the girl, my search for my purpose and identity had ended. I no longer continued to make time to grow alone, I began giving all of my time to my girlfriends.
Slowly they would lose attraction and respect for me which would land us in a ton of senseless petty arguments, resulting in the end of a relationship time and time again. I repeated this cycle over and over until I realized that I thought the woman was my identity. I thought she was my purpose; so I gave up everything, thinking she was what I was looking for all along.
I am here to tell you today that until you know “you” you are not going to be able to properly get to know anyone else. Make time for your own life, search for your own identity and the women will flock to you. Happiness is found on inside of you, not in between ladies legs.
If you want to get good with women because you think this is the reason you aren’t happy you better think again. Follow your heart and find your happiness eternally and you want have to approach a girl, they will be approaching you.
If you have been looking for yourself for a long time and have no idea where to start contact me at EddieFews@wayoftheplayer.com for Consultation through Instant Messenger, Skype, or In Person One on One Coaching. We all need somebody, don’t let your pride stand in the way of your happiness.
Eddie Fews
Dating & Seduction Coach
