There are many myths surrounding the seduction scene, some have basis in truth, most however are just misleading and damaging.
Due to the nature of men judging their fellow man by his sexual exploits as well as his personal merit, many feel as if they can not truly succeed in the world without having acquired significant carnal knowledge of the opposite sex. In other words, not many people take virgins seriously.
So in order to appear to be truly wise in our understanding of the opposite sex, men will often make assertions which other men may construe as fact and this can lead to an abundance of prevalent myths within the seduction world which in turn, can lead men and women to make terrible mistakes.
So in order to avoid this, we have listed for you the ‘Top 10 Seduction Myths’ that we have recognised to be most counter-productive and prevalent in contemporary society.
Seduction Myth 1. If you treat them mean it will keep them keen.
This particular myth is based around proactively lowering a girls self esteem for the purpose of making her feel like you are better than her and making her believe that she needs you.
Now although this might sound fantastic to anyone harbouring misogynistic feelings, rest assured that this evil behaviour will not work for you in the long run because beautiful women who are treated this way almost always end up cheating on the asshole who is treating them mean. Why? Because their self-esteem gets so low that they become desperate for a man to appreciate and like them.
Although habit might bring them back to you with their tails between their legs, you have effectively destroyed any chance of having a meaningful relationship with this girl the moment you tried to manipulate her and therefore you will never get to experience the euphoria of love that comes with sharing one’s inner most vulnerable self with another.
Seduction Myth 2. You should never buy a girl a drink if you want her to like you.
Ever since the world renowned bestseller ‘The Game’ by ‘Neil Straus’ hit the worlds bookshelves, the world has seen a new generation of socially awkward men who outright refuse to buy beautiful women drinks.
Now Neil does have a point in that, beautiful women will often just pretend to be interested in men to get free drinks. However, what Neil failed to clarify in his book is, although it’s important never to allow beautiful women to use us for drinks or rely on the cliche ’can I buy you a drink?’ pickup line, it is much worse for our game to appear to be a tightass and sometimes it doesn’t actually hurt to open up your wallet and share the wealth.
If a girl asks you if you can buy her a drink, then you should definately be suspicious, if she asks you to buy her AND her friends a drink, then should feel insulted and they probably aren’t legal anyway.
If you come across this situation then it doesn’t hurt to test them to see if they are there for you, or your money. Just say ‘I actually need to get more cash out, how about you buy this round and I will buy the next’, if she walks then you have your answer, if she says ’okay’ then fantastic, if she says ’I would but I don’t have any money’ then ask her if she wants to come with you to the ATM, then use this opportunity to isolate her and make a move.
Seduction Myth 3. You need to slay a few Dragons before you can get to the Princesses.
A lot of guys believe that if they want to pick up Super Models then they should practice on ugly girls and slowly work their way up… This does not work. It will only make you better at picking up ugly girls and will keep you at the bottom of the poonani chain (or as we prefer, the Poonani Pyramid).
If you want to learn to pick up hot girls you need to practice on hot girls. It’s like learning to drive a manual car as opposed to an automatic, they are the same thing but they are also different and require different skill-sets to operate effectively.
The truth is, beautiful women generally have very different attitudes and standards to ugly girls. They have had things come to them a lot easier in life, they are used to being the selectors rather than the selected. They can afford to have high standards and will always have plentiful options. So as a Player your only real option is to learn how to play their game.
Seduction Myth 4. Beautiful women are harder to seduce.
Pretty girls enjoy sex just as much as girls who aren’t pretty.
Sure they tend to have higher standards but as long as you set a high personal standard of yourself then you shouldn’t have any problem with measuring up to this standard.
Beautiful women can be just as promiscuous, just as horny and just as keen, they are flesh and blood just like all the other girls out there, the only major difference is, they are not as desperate.
Most of the time a girl has already decided if she wants to go home with a guy before she even puts on her make-up. Whether that guy is you or some other dude comes down to whether you can bring your A game to the table and more importantly, whether you are willing to give it a shot in the first place.
The biggest thing that stops normal guys from going home with the bodacious babes, is that they never even try in the first place. If you don’t present yourself as an option then you never enter the contest. You need to be in it to win it.
That is the most fundamental key to having good game, daring to go after the girls that you want rather than waiting for them to come to you.
Seduction Myth 5. Look’s aren’t important, it is what’s on the inside that matters.
This is something that unattractive people tell themselves to make themselves feel better but the truth is, looks do matter, they always have mattered.
However, your face is only a small part of what makes someone aesthetically pleasing and despite what many say, ‘you can polish a turd’ and if the correct steps are taken then almost anyone can become attractive. (See ‘The Players guide to style, Mastering the basics’)
Don’t fool yourself into thinking that you can let your looks go as long as you have a great personality. As intellectual as we are as a species we are still very superficial when it comes to selecting a mate and although exceptionally beautiful women will most often settle for men who are not exceptionally beautiful themselves, those men will still need to be ‘good looking enough’ in order to be considered as sexual partners.
Obviously this is all in the eye of the beholder, what is ugly to one person may be beautiful to another.
Seduction Myth 6. If a hot girl is with an ugly guy then he must have lots of money.
This is something that just about all men have wondered about at some point or another.
When we see an exceptionally hot girl with an average looking guy, our ego’s make us think ‘he must be really rich to be with a girl so out of his league’… And maybe you’re right, maybe he owns a few Football teams, maybe he shits into a jewell encrusted toilet but either way you would be kind of wrong in thinking that it was his money she wanted because it’s not really his money at all, it’s the security that money ostensibly offers.
Beautiful women will quite often disregard physically undesirable traits if the security on offer is good enough to compensate, especially if this woman has come from an underprivileged background.
Money is much more important to some women than it is to others and to assume that money is all that women care about, is to ensure that you spend many a lonely night in front of your computer with your trousers to the floor angrily throttling your member to the visions of young attractive women enthusiastically degrading themselves on Redtube.
This kind of shallow thinking will only lead to awkward situations and prioritising the acquisition of material items over personal development.
You can be the richest guy in the world and although you might be able to pay beautiful women to have sex with you, you can’t buy their love with money. You need to be more than an ATM card to a woman to make her fall for you.
So is she just with him for the money? Well, if he’s paying her then yes, she undoubtedly is but most women are not prostitutes and they need more than Beluga caviar and bright shiny trinkets to make them happy (although this does help) they need a real lover to share their lives with.
Seduction Myth 7. All women like big muscles.
A lot of men spend ridiculous amounts of time in the gym under the belief that the bigger they get the more attractive they will become.
Well although this might be true to a certain extent (most women prefer athletic muscular men) this also has it’s limitations. For many women, having too much muscle is more unattractive than not having enough and over muscled men such as body builders can appear frightening and grotesque and this is not attractive.
Ever since we were young, reading comic books and watching cartoons, we were made to believe that big muscular body building types like Batman, Superman, Captain America etc. were the ideal man and these guys always got the girls. However, the reality is that the real life versions of these hulks, spend most of their time shrinking their testicals and giving themselves early onset athritus in an isolated room with other grotesquely hulkish men and are rarely out in the real world.
Subsequently they leave too little time to work on their social skills placing too big an emphasis on their ill thought body building goals and when it comes to seducing beautiful women into their beds, they struggle to have a conversation.
This is of course, a stereotypical assessment of a body builder but the fact remains, most beautiful women find body builders unattractive, so it is a poor choice of cultural franchise to buy into.
Seduction Myth 8. Texting is the new calling.
In the digital age we are finding that more and more men prefer to use text messaging as an alternative means of contact when getting in contact with girls that they are interested in.
Many fervent ‘Texters’ will tell you that text messaging is more casual than calling and therefore it yields better results because it isn’t as confrontational as calling.
What they wont tell you is that most of the girls they are keen on and try to seduce from text, don’t end up sleeping with them. In fact in many cases, they wont even reply.
This leads the Texter to think that the girl isn’t interested in them and this makes them either angry or sad, when really the girl could have been very interested in him, he just chose a shitty way of courting her.
What many of these Texter’s don’t realise is, it is a good thing that phone calls are confrontational because that is the best way to illicit a firm response and quite often a girl will gradually lose interest in between the time she gave you her number and when you choose to contact her. Sometimes they will even forget you entirely.
The beauty of calling is, once they hear your voice they will begin to remember why they liked you enough to give you their number in the first place and they wont put it down to a moment of bad judgement. See (10 Easy tips for seducing a girl on the phone)
Seduction Myth 9. If a girl kisses you then she wants to have sex with you.
This is a classic mistake that just about all attractive Western heterosexual men make at some point in their lives.
They get a kiss from a pretty girl when they’re out and they figure they have their foot in the door, so they hang around her like a bad smell unable to take a hint or, at the end of the night when they’re ready to claim their prize they get an unexpected rejection when they try to take things to the next level and end up heading home for a cold lonely shower.
Well this is because in the scheme of things, a kiss is not a promise. A kiss is just a kiss and although it is a profound gesture of goodwill and mutual sexual interest, it is not an expressway to the bedroom and you shouldn’t be ‘counting your chickens until they hatch’.
If you have gotten a kiss from the girl you are keen on then you have made some progress but you’re not in the homeward stretch yet, (see Bar to Bedroom the Players Guide) you still have a bit of work ahead of you if you want to get laid on the night.
There are lots of reasons why girls might kiss guys, attention, boredom, poverty, to make another guy jealous but there is only one reason for a girl taking it to the next level and sleeping with a guy she has just met, desire.
If a girl has enough desire then she will have sex with a stranger, sure once you get married for some it becomes more of an obligation but if there is no obligation then she is doing it because there is something about you she inately desires and she wants to consumate your bond together.
Kisses mean significantly more to some girls than others, some girls will kiss thousands of guys in a lifetime but only sleep with a select few of them, other girls will kiss hardly any guys but sleep with all of them. Kissing and sex are related but kissing doesn’t necessarily lead to sex, in fact in most instances it just leads to more kissing and nothing more.
The best way to ensure that kissing does lead to something more is to follow a process of physical escalation because although kissing isn’t a bridge to sex it is a doorway to other types of physical contact which will lead to sex. See (The 5 crucial steps of sexual escalation)
Seduction Myth 10. If a girl sleeps with you then she wants a relationship.
Perhaps the biggest myth of all, for so many men out there who find themselves in awkward counter-productive situations with girls they have just slept with because they have come to believe that if a girl sleeps with us then she wants a relationship and the sex means more than it really does.
Well once upon a time when women were not allowed to vote and female employment was severely limited to mudane tasks, such as Knitting, Maiding and Cow milking. There were not a lot of opportunities out there for women to get ahead in society.
So in order for women to ensure that they, and any children they bore were adequately provided for, they needed to find themselves a man who could provide for them otherwise they would likely starve or end up working in a brothel.
However since womens liberation and birth control came to the West, women now enjoy much the same independance that men have for millenias. Unlike their unfortunate ancestors, opening their legs in a moment of passion to a man, doesn’t result in them carrying his offspring around for the next 9 months and being entirely dependant upon him.
Women are now as sexually liberated as men, they can afford to sleep around and try different things with different guys because they can and with such media influences as ‘Sex and the City’ and ‘Friends’ etc. Society often expects women to be a bit promiscuous before they settle down.
The days of marrying the first guy they sleep with are well and truly over, now women can play the field without fear of life altering consequences, and they do.
However this new age liberal feminism trend has left a lot of traditionalist men confused and often hurt, because their expectations do not live up to reality and they find themselves playing a role traditionally played by women, that of the party trying to procure a relationship from a casual fling.
So how do we avoid getting hurt by these heartbreakers?
Simple, we alter our expectations to be in line with contemporary society. We allow ourselves to enjoy casual sex without the emotional intimacy and when we do sleep with a girl that we like, we don’t treat her willingness to jump into bed with us as a commitment but rather as a gesture of interest.
It is not so uncommon in this day and age for a couple to go on their first date together after they have already had sex. These days sexual intimacy is more freely given and available than emotional intimacy. It can take hours for a girl to offer you her pussy but months and even years for her to truly offer you her heart.
Once upon a time in Civilized society it was quite the opposite and there were a lot of extremely horny young men and women about! Thankgoodness only our souls are deprived in these modern times and not our loins.