Players Need An Abundance Mentality
Too many men are too concerned with saying the perfect thing to a girl they like; more often than not this dilemma stems from a fear of failure and/or a lack of abundance.
What fear you might ask? The fear of saying the wrong thing and potentially blowing an opportunity with the girl. And this is the very thing that beautiful women find least attractive about a man, why would they want to be with a guy that nobody else wants?
Do you remember when you were a child and the best toys were always the one that your sibling or friends wanted to play with the most? The more popular the toy was with your peers, the more you wanted it. And not much has changed.
Women are most attracted to men that could not care less whether they lose them or not because it shows that he has other options and he is probably ‘in demand’. No-one wants the easy guy/girl with no standards who will take whatever they can get, they want to win the prize and that always involves some challenge and competition.
Abundance Equals Demand
Take this for example: there are two restaurants directly across the street from each other. One restaurant has a line that extends all the way down the street and the other is completely empty… Which one would you rather be eating at?
The one with the long line of course because you want what appears to be good from the outside. The famous quote, never judge a book by its cover, is the very thing we all fall victim to from day to day.
The empty restaurant could very well have the worlds best food but no one would ever find out and this is the very thing that men regularly do with women. Men make it too obvious that their restaurant is empty (that they have no abundance of beautiful women in their life) and no-one wants somebody that nobody else wants or appears not to want.
Another reason women find a man’s fear in losing them is unattractive, is because it’s in complete conflict to their reality. We only really know what it is we experience and beautiful women have men hitting on them all of the time.
The average hot girl has about 5 guys she’s rotating and texting at any given time, so to be on her level you would either have to have the same or at least create the appearance that you do through your behaviour. There are 3.5 billion women on the planet! What makes you think she is that much more special and important than all the rest of them. 3.5 billion; that means if you had sex with 3 women a day for 100 years you wouldn’t have even slept with 1% of the women in the world.
I think that makes the message very clear, that there are plenty of beautiful women and no one should ever dictate your life so deeply that you begin to feel fear or anxiety from any one girl. By doing so, you are sub-communicating that you are incapable of finding anyone better or equal and at that point she has you by the balls.
Now no-one is saying that you have to date multiple women at a time but the least you can do is create a life that is eventful. Take up a new hobby, go out and make new friends, start a small business but please don’t sit drooling over the phone waiting for some text message from someone that could very well be gone with the wind.
Actually, your best text messages are usually the one that you write when you have the least time to think because you’re brain is preoccupied with more important things. When you live a life that has genuine purpose and importance no one text messages means as much to you as it would to someone with nothing going on.
We’ve all had that “Dear Beth Cooper” highschool crush in which we thought our lives would be over if we didn’t get this or that particular girl. And.. If you’re reading this than guess what? You’re alive and Beth Cooper wants the guy that has an ‘abundance mentality’ and couldn’t care less if he doesn’t get her because this is the very mind state that allows her to feel like the guy isn’t dependent on her for happiness.
That’s a lot of pressure to deal with, imagine if the girl you were with couldn’t be happy unless you were around. You’d probably run for your life and I wouldn’t blame you.
Therefore, never make any one thing the complete source of your happiness. Whether it be money, a girlfriend or family; design a life for you’re self that is making you happy in as many areas as possible.
This mentality can be taking a lot further than seduction and women. Who is more likely to land the job; the guy who is desperate for a position because he is in need of money, or the guy with 5-6 other interviews set up for the week?
When in a position of abundance, all the pressure is alleviated. Now don’t be surprised when another multi-millionaire wins the lottery. Your mindset and attitude is 90% of what is going to land you the new girl or the new job.
“Your thoughts become your words, your words become your actions, your actions become your habits, your habits become your character and your character becomes your destiny.”
It all begins in the mind.. Thoughts can be changed by simply being self aware and replacing negative thoughts with positive ones until it becomes natural. Few people take the time to listen to what’s really going on in their heads.
We all tend to live in a state of thought-emotion or emotion-thought. We get an emotion and this produces thoughts or we get a thought and this produces emotion. If you would take five minutes out of your day to sit in silence with your eyes closed you would see exactly what I am talking about.
Add some order to this, correct and label you’re thoughts. So the next time you’re sweating over a text message just remember how many beautiful women there are in the world and put things into perspective. Give yourself an abundance mentality.
By Eddie Fews
If you are looking for help peeling back the layers and finding your core Life purpose, you can email me at EddieFews@wayoftheplayer.comby