If you want to go far in life and achieve your goals, then you need to surround yourself with postivity.
One of the first things we need to do when creating any kind of major change in our lives, is to take a good honest look at ourselves and our lives and identify the areas where we need improvement and then we need to set about consciously making those improvements happen.
This isn’t necessarily as easy as it sounds because quite often we have become attached to these negative aspects of our lives and we have difficulty to let go, even though we know it’s bad for us to hold on.
There are many reasons of why we would do something so irrational as hold onto negativity, such as pride or fear but none of these reasons are fundamentally good enough to justify your unhappiness and unfulfilled dreams.
Take Responsibility For Your Own Happiness
We are all given one chance in life and one chance only, whether you live that life positively or negatively is completely up to you; despite what many of us have learnt from a young age, there is no other force in this world that controls your happiness or success but you.
There is really no good luck, or bad luck. Good luck by essence happens to people who work hard, stay positive and keep an open mind, bad luck happens to people who are lazy, negative and cynical and you might be thinking to yourself as you’re reading this, “hang on a second, that can’t be true, sometimes sh*t things happen to good people and vice versa, you can’t guarantee a life of good luck”
And that is true, bad things do happen to good honest people but those people aren’t always positive, they don’t always surround themselves with positivity, positive and negative are not good and evil. Positive and negative is not just a state of mind, they are two totally different worlds which exist within the same realm to create an equilibrium.
If you live in a positive world and something bad happens to you, then no matter what it was you will find a way to make it something positive. Whether it be your parents dying, or you being robbed or dumped, you will always find a way to see an upside for every downside and you will believe in a light at the end of the tunnel and the power of this belief will ensure that as a positive person good things will always happen to you.
When you live in a negative world and something bad happens to you, you will let it feed your negativity about the world about you and you will begin to believe things like, “the world is against me” and “I am truly alone in the world” and because you believe that so strongly, you will interact with the world in a negative way and the power of this belief will cause negative things to happen to you, it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.
There is a big misconception for many young people living in hard conditions; that negative cynical people, are tougher, stronger, more resilient to life’s challenges and therefore this is the best way to survive and ensure that they are never victims.
This might be true if they end up in somewhere like prison, or on the streets, they would survive where others could not but their negativity will ensure that they get there in the first place and once they are there, the King’s of their own private hell, they will always be trapped there in a prison of their making and they will continually spread their misery and negativity like a sickness to those around them.
Create A Positive Social Circle
It is these people, these negative sentient influences who make it most difficult for us to change and they aren’t always school bullies or abusive step-parents either. Sometimes these people are our close friends, people who’s company we enjoy but who continuously dump their problems on us and drain our positivity with their negativity.
It is one thing when our demons are our own but when they have a physical manifestation it suddenly takes more than positive thinking to overcome them, it takes positive actions. Sometimes on the journey to becoming a better happier person we need to leave some of those demons behind on the way and then we start finding new influences to help us along; positive influences which feed our positivity instead of sapping it like a parasite.
As you’re reading this you probably have someone in mind, someone who dragged you down over the years instead of lifting you up. This may have been a past or previous friend and it was someone who you probably once felt a lot of loyalty towards and loyalty is an interesting emotion because it seems like a good thing but it’s actually totally neutral.
Loyalty causes people to do terrible things as often as it inspires them to do wonderful things, it is not positive or negative, it can go either way and it can be used to tie people down, as well as propel them forward.
If you feel loyal to someone who has acted in a way to make you question that loyalty, then don’t discourage that line of thinking and don’t be ashamed of it. Loyalty is earned and deserved and when someone is treating you in a manner which is not positive or proactive to you, then that loyalty has expired and whether they are family or friends, they are robbing you of your happiness and you don’t owe them anything.
By actively seeking out and befriending people who want to be positive influences in your life, you are ensuring that you have a positive circle flowing, where in, you emit positivity and you receive constantly and as a result you are able to ensure you can live a positive life full of positive things and you will help others do the same.
An Exercise
I’m going to ask you to do something now beyond reading this article I have wrote for you today. I want you to do an exercise with me and you are going to need a pen and paper NOT Microsoft Word, or Notepad. I want you to write this down on paper, it will have more significance this way because these are your first thoughts and you wont be able unwrite them once they are written.
Part 1. Write down 5 names of people whom you consider to be your closest friends…
Part 2. Write down 5 names of people whom you consider to be your closest family members…
Part 3. Write down 5 names of people that you hate most in this world…
For Part 1 (closest friends) I want you to write down from 1 to 5, who your closest friend is to your least closest friend.
For Part 2 (family members) I want you to write down from 1 to 5, who you spend the most time with in your family.
Now I want you to put a number going from 1-10 next to each of those names (family and friends only) in declining order of who is the most positive influence in your life, to the least positive influence in your life, 1 being the most positive, 10 being the least.
…If you are living a well adjusted positive life, then the results of this shouldn’t bother you. If you did this exercise and then you felt upset by it, then you know what you need to do and the reason you are feeling upset is because you dread it.
You are probably wondering right now about part 3 and you should be because this is actually the most important part of this exercise because if you were able to sit there and fill out five names of people you hate, then you are are letting yourself be ruled by negativity.
If you truly hate five people in the world, then this is not a reflection of them, it is a reflection of you. They might be bad people, but it takes a negative person to hate them and as long as you hate them, they will always have power over you and you will never be truly free to live a positive life until you don’t hate anyone.
Attract Beautiful Women By Displaying Positivity
Becoming a positive person wont just help make you happier but it will help you on your journey to become a player and your career and just about anything else you could want in life.
Beautiful women are attracted to men who have goals and ambitions in life, this is how they separate the winners from the losers and beautiful women want to be with men who are going to go places and do great things.
Positive men are also able to have great confidence because they believe that good things will happen when they project their personality and leadership onto those around them and the best leaders in history have always been men who believed that they and their people were capable of doing great things, i.e. they were positive people.
Since confidence is the most universally attractive male quality for women and since leaders are usually alpha males, it is quite safe to assume that there is a link here and if you have ever heard the saying “You will win more bees with honey than with vinegar” the same principle applies here.
So be proactive, fill your life with positivity and the world will reward you for it, I promise you, you can’t start being more positive right now, you just need to make the decision, the power is completely yours.
By Kieran Black
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