Lying To Women Has A Price
This is one of those articles that is therapeutic for me because not only am I reaching out and teaching our readers but I am teaching and reminding myself of what it is I need to do in my own life. Sit back and enjoy.
I have always enforced being honest about who you are to women; and for most of my life I held true to this value. I could careless about the people who walked out of my life because they couldn’t handle the truth. But this particular time I had run into something a little different.
I had begun doing some personal research into online dating to prepare a online dating workshop and a few articles for Way of the Player. In this study I had made multiple online dating profiles, all of myself on multiple online dating websites. I used the exact same pictures on each profile; but I would change up the content on the writing portions. On some profiles I presented myself as grad school graduate, others I presented myself as a high-school dropout turned entrepreneur etc… I would send out the same exact online openers that I developed to attractive and unattractive women all over the dating sites and the results were astonishing – I’ll get more into that on the actual Online Dating article.
Long story short, as I was doing my normal routine research I came across this one profile that amazed me. It had nothing to do with the content of the profile in particular; but just the beauty, energy and the presence of the women in photos. I refused my instant urge to send her one of my “Canned Openers” and sent her the first thing that came into my mind. A couple minutes later and BAM – she wrote back to me with energy and excitement. I responded back to her upping the intensity of the interaction just one notch. She returned my second message with a little more fire power than the first and I knew at this moment the only way to take things a step further would be to get her on the phone. I messaged her on the third message telling her we best get to yapping on the phone while there is this much fuel being thrown into the fire. She complied, I picked up the phone and called right away.
It was like I had known her my entire life the moment we got onto the phone, no awkward silences, no pauses, and no thinking about what I would say next. The conversation just sort of flowed effortlessly, but there was still one little problem; she still didn’t know who I was. I was so enticed by her femininity that I didn’t have the courage to tell her the content on my profile wasn’t the guy that I truly was. I would be risking this new rush and feeling, I’d be risking a potential love. So like a great actor would, I remained in character and became the very guy I detailed in my profile. After a hour on the phone that felt like ten minutes to us, she invited me to her concert on that very night. She warned me that she wouldn’t be able to see me much when I got there because she would be singing and playing instruments until 3:30 AM. Although she would get a ten minute break in the middle of the show so I agreed to go because ten minutes was all I needed.
This was one of those “Special” girls, I knew it and I was thrilled.
I arrived at the venue, at around 12:30 AM, fitted in my best clothes, and nervous. When I had entered the place, I looked on the stage and saw her singing her heart out; my pupils widened, my heart rate sped up about to about 140 BPM and I instantly felt what many would call love at first site. I wanted to run up on stage, pick her up, spin her around, and kiss her at that moment, but the security guards were looking awfully strong. I could probably take one of them, but the other would certainly roll me into a ball and shove me into a shot glass. So I waited patiently and enjoyed the show.
40 Minutes later it was time for the 10 minutes interlude and here was my chance to get a one on one with the future superstar. By the time I found her she was surrounded by a crowd of people; all praising her work and telling her how amazing of a performer she was. I reached through the crowd, pinched her on her waist, and smiled at her. She slipped out of the huddle and jumped into my arms as if I was her hero, there to save the day. I took her out back for a walk, where I instantly told her that she would be my new girlfriend. She jumped out at the idea with enthusiasm. At that very moment we were together, and we didn’t care who knew and how they felt about us.
We remained together in harmony until just last night; the tension had built up within our relationship. I grew tired of playing this character; I knew that eventually I would have to give it up but I had fell so in love that I became a victim of fear. We sat in my bedroom where I reluctantly revealed to her that I haven’t been the guy she thought I was. I told her about the real me, and she sat there heartbroken. Torn apart that I had led her to believe a lie for as long as I did. She didn’t necessarily care that I wasn’t the guy she thought, she was more hurt over the fact that I lied to her. I felt ashamed and guilty, but I kept my cool, made a few jokes and we talked about the issue at hand like adults.
Before she left I could see in her eyes that she had discovered a new found respect for not only me, but the male species as a whole. Who knows what will become of our relationship now but I’m hella excited to find out. Either way I am certain there will be more of these “special” girls that will enter my life. There have been many in the past and there will be many more in the future. This was just a lesson that needed to be learned at this particular point of my life.
I say all this this to say, be honest about who you always. Whoever doesn’t accept you for who you are doesn’t deserve a place in your life. As Bernard Baruch once said “those who matter won’t mind, and those who mind don’t matter”.
Peace & Love
By Eddie Fews[social_share\]