How to master the art of approaching
By Eddie Fews
The world today is full of people living in their heads, caught up in their own little world disregarding everything else going on externally.
Modern technology doesn’t aid us in this at all. Instead, it gives people an additional escape to what is going on around us so although ostensibly modern communcation devices appear to be liberating us, they are also isolating and introverting us.
Everywhere you go people have their headphones in their ears and they look like anti-social zombies just moving along from destination to destination, mundane task to mundane task. They yap away on their phones and text each other at all hours of the day oblivious to the fact that they are not really communicating with one another.
Have you ever tried to listen to a friend that was speaking to you whilst texting? Its practically impossible to do both. Which brings me to my first point..
Preparation for approaching
If you want to be a Successful Player/Pick Up Artist/ Seducer Etc. you must be aware of what is going on in the world about you, this means turning OFF your Ipods, MP3’s, and putting away your cell phones(turning them on silent).
For new guys it also helps to go as far as turning your Cells phones off or leaving them at home so you aren’t even tempted to reach for it when things get “awkward”.
Bring a piece of paper and a pen for now, which will also aid you in some interesting conversation with the girl once you write down her number about how the world is constantly plugged into technology(if she’s into that kind of thing).
The social guy is not walking around texting and blasting music in his ears because he realizes how many women he’ll miss out on talking to by just not being aware.
I’ve also read in a study that blasting music in your ears lowers your vibrations; in other words it minimizes the amount of presence you have. It’s key to learn to be rooted in reality and content with who you are, what you are, where you are and why you are.
When you can do this effectively, you won’t have to approach beautiful women because they will be approaching you.
Mental practices for approaching
Here goes two good exercises to root you in reality and allow you to live in the present moment
The simple one : As your walking around pick a color in your head, for example “green”, now Look around and noticed all the green objects your surrounded by. This is also very exciting to see how the colors you choose just seem to jump out and stare at you.
Try it now as you’re reading this, pick any color and then look around the room you’re in….. Now imagine if you substitute the color for beautiful Women 😉
The advanced one: The key to being rooted in reality is to be present with your body, how often do we put our shoes on, feel them on our feet as soon as they get on but then completely forget the feeling of them being there because we are so worried about what’s going on in our heads.
The same principle applies to shirts/pants/hats etc. You are more than just a talking head, you have a whole body that you should be aware of at all times. Remember this, ” I am a body, I am more than just a head.
The average human awareness system works like this: They get a thought and then a feeling or a Feeling and then a thought; this overrides their entire body and it becomes all they can focus on. Is that any way to live?
Practice feeling every part of your body at once.. Start feeling you Toes, Feet, ankles, moving up to your shin and calfs, up to your knees waist, groin, testicles, penis,pelvis, stomach, ribs, lungs, heart, throat tongue, teeth head. Learn what these things feel like while you’re not using them. There is always a taste in our mouths even when we aren’t eating, remember what this taste like..
Doing things like this grounds you in the present moment; and during these times you have the largest presence, strongest aura and the most attractive vibe.
Your approaching mindset
While you’re out there in the real world meeting beautiful women what you simply want to do while approaching is, find out if the girl has an attractive personality.
Before you approach you should say to yourself ” She’s cute, let me go find out if she has an attractive personality”; You want to find out if the beautiful women are interesting.
When you approach them with that mindset, the conversation you have with the girl will revolve around wether she is someone YOU would want to be with.
When you approach with this mindset women will be trying to prove to you that they DO have an attractive personality and that they are someone you would like to be with.
This make your job so much easier, you’ll just have to listen and ask all the questions that reflect the mind-state you already have. She will practically talk YOU into going home with her.
After all you are the attractive one that had to courage and to break the fake social barriers the world has and approach her. Its her turn to contribute to what you have already offered her.
When I approach beautiful women I am giving them the opportunity to meet an absolute amazing human being. I am doing her the favor by making it so easy for her to get to talk to me.
In fact, I know she wanted to talk to me all along and if she shared the same confidence I did she would have done it first, but I beat her to it and now it’s her job to prove to me why I should continue speaking with her. Do you see where I am going?
There are 7 billion people in the world and only one me.. She will probably never get this opportunity again for the rest of her life. Lets just say for some reason you get rejected (and you will), shrug it off and just know that she didn’t have the attractive personality that you were looking for all along.
No big deal! You are out to meet beautiful women that understand what is in front of them anyway aren’t you? Lets just say you had a billion dollars you want to give away; and you offered it to someone and they said “NO”.
Would you care that much that they didn’t except it? HELL NO, you know that someone else will happily accept what you giving and appreciate it. You are the billion dollars you want to share with someone; Go give it away!
While You’re Out
Just remember to keep your head up looking around and expecting to meet beautiful women all the time.
Look around and explore the world for beautiful women you can go and meet. Hold a slight grin and walk with a light bounce in your step. The world is your playground, treat it like such.
Remember this Quote “Your fear is always about whats going to happen next, that means your fear is always about that which does not exist.”
If your fear is about the non-existent, your fear is 100% imaginary. Are you telling me that you Fear your own imagination?..We call that insanity..” Fight fear at every cost, its the number one inhibiter of success and thats with everything.
Don’t let fear stop you from meeting all the beautiful women you will be seeing up ahead.
By Eddie Fews
If you want one-on-one personal coaching or one-on-one online coaching you can email me at EddieFews@wayoftheplayer.com I work in the New York city Area for personal coaching and I do online Coaching with people from all over there world.
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