The Playa’s guide to making your friendly for sex
Before you go out for a big night on the town or a date with a girl you like, there are some housekeeping issues you should really address if you want everything to go smoothly into sex while in bedroom.
One thing a lot of guys don’t realize is that most beautiful women wont want to have sex with a guy unless they feel completely comfortable and secure with him and within his house.
If you have ever had a girl up in your room and just haven’t been able to seal the deal it is very likely that was because one of the following essentials were overlooked by yourself and this made her uncomfortable and turned her off sex.
The following guide; developed from picking the brains of scores of very successful playas and very beautiful women alike, will address all the most common factors associated with causing discomfort for beautiful women in men’s bedrooms.
If addressed properly and thoroughly not only will it permanently improve your lay rate, you will also find that the girls you are bringing home are suddenly willing to be a lot kinkier than they normally would and you can look forward to a spicier playa sex life.
Your playa pad
Your pad; your castle says a lot about you as a person. The area it’s in, the era it was built, the type of residence, the general upkeep etc. For many of us our financial incomes limit the opulence in which we can live, so we can’t all have 40 bedroom mansions with Olympic size swimming pools, but we don’t need to either.
If you are living in commission housing or the projects then chances are you will struggle to pull the upper echelon of society’s beautiful women back to your property, they just won’t feel safe and you are better off going back to their place, even if you’re an amazing playa.
As long as your house is ‘nice enough’ then the beautiful women you bring back shouldn’t have any qualms with stepping through the door; after all, you’ve already gotten that far. There are however some vital things you will need to evaluate about your house if you want it to go well from there.
If you’re still living at home with your parents, then make sure they are cool with your playa lifestyle and you bringing girls home; there is nothing worse than when you bring a girl home and you tell her she has to tip-toe and be quiet at risk of waking your parents.
This scares the shit out of girls, last thing you want to have when you’re getting busy is your mother knocking on your door and asking what you’re doing or if you remembered to take the trash out or even worse, having your parents actually walk in on you and her! Chances are you will never hear from that girl again. That is just not playa.
Ideally if you have the option, move out! It is definitely worth it in the long run if you want to get laid more often and live with some of your playa bro’s.
Otherwise rent a motel room, stay at her place or if there is absolutley no alternative then just be super quiet coming into your bedroom but don’t, if you have any common sense, bring a one night stand home and introduce her to your parents.
Your house is a temple, everything inside it a tribute to you as a person and a playa. If she has to walk over old McDonald’s wrappers and week old lasagne then she will see you as the slob you are and look for the first chance she can get to make a run for it.
You don’t always need to be Mr. Clean playa but it pays to do a one over before you go out on a night on the town or a date with a girl you like because you never know when you might get lucky and be bringing her home with you.
Old food and dirty dishes are the biggest no-no for a playa, so if you’re in a hurry then take care of that first; a few dirty clothes you can get away with but stained jocks will not win you any points. If you’re a bit of a hoarder then you will need to sort that out, get a playa friend to help you go through what you need and don’t need. The more you have the likelier it is that your place will look messy and playa’s aren’t messy.
The temperature might not matter to you very much, maybe you’re one of those energy efficient people who just put a jumper on when you’re cold or strip down to your jocks when you’re hot but for a girl who has never been to your house before the temperature will play a big role in how she acts inside it.
If it is too hot she might worry about being sweaty, to cold and she won’t want to take her clothes off; a smart playa will make sure he has some way of regulating the temperature to make her comfortable, even take the time to ask her she’d like the heating on, it could save you a lot of time and complaints in the long run.
If you have room-mates make sure you have clear indications of each other’s boundaries and what to do in the event that somebody brings a girl home.
Girls often worry about pervert roommates walking in on them in the act and when they have just come home from a night out you don’t particularly want to introduce her to your room mates either; She would already be unsure enough of you as it is without introducing her to the other people you live with.
Whilst in your house she should feel like you and her are the only ones there and you have the utmost privacy and discretion. To ensure this a smart playa would text/call his playa housemates who you know are going to be home so they can make themselves scarce until you get her in your room.
If you don’t want to do that then the “tie on the door handle” is the universal playa sign for “don’t come in I’m getting my freak on” which should give her some confidence that you will not be disturbed by unwanted guests.
Your playa bedroom
Your bedroom should give off the impression of privacy and style to any girl who enters it. Ultimately it is your room; your playa habitat, that you will give off the greatest impression on. Even if the rest of your house is messy as long as your room is clean and playa then you should still be okay.
If you have ever watched a television show on MTV called ‘room raiders’ then you will see just how much we judge others by the state of their room, messy equals unreliable, perfect equals pedantic, you’ll want to have a serious think about how you want to come across to others through what you display in your playa boudoir.
In this segment we are going to highlight some of the major turnoffs and issues to consider when making your bedroom girl friendly. Follow these playa guidelines and you shouldn’t have a problem with making the best impression by your room.
Lock on door
This is actually NOT a necessity but it is very useful to have one. It will make her feel a lot safer knowing there is a physical barrier preventing unwanted visitors because the reality is ‘your word’ that no one will come in, isn’t always enough to instill confidence in her.
If you’re able make the investment and screw a bolt lock into place otherwise make sure you take other precautions to ensure the security of your bedroom and anyone you bring into it. A playa takes into consideration all of the little things like this that other men overlook.
Action figures, comic books, stamp collections, bug collections. These things are all geeky and unattractive to women, unless you picked up the 0.01% of hot geeky girls out there who are actually into this stuff, you really need to reconsider your priorities here.
Would you rather be a playa and get laid regularly by beautiful women or stay faithful to your weird geeky habits?
Put it out of sight if you’re expecting company. Women want to have sex with playa men not geeky boys and even though your buddies might think it’s cool that you have a vintage 1982 Aquaman action figure with rotating arms; she won’t, and you will be the laughing stock of her and her cute friends.
Playboy, Hustler, Maxim; doesn’t matter if you ‘only read the articles’ girls hate seeing this stuff in a guys room. ‘American Pie’ is not real life; most beautiful women won’t walk into a guys room, see some porn and start masturbating, unfortunately this is not the world that we live in.
Most girls will see some sleazy magazines or posters and think that you are shallow, sleazy and objective of women; you might be all of those things but as a playa you don’t want women to know this because this will not make them want to have sex with you.
Every guy has a stash of porn in one form or another but, the idea of having porn soft-core or hardcore is that you keep it hidden in a special porno chest away from prying eyes; you don’t leave it open on your bed stand surrounded by scrunched up tissues or have Bree Olsen’s latest vid flashing up on your computer screen. Discretion pays off for a playa.
The rule with decorations is quite simple. Unless you are a fifteen year old school boy you should not have posters up on your wall. That means; no car posters, no ‘playmate of the year posters, no rock’n roll posters. There ONLY exception where it is okay to have posters up on your wall is if they are framed memorabilia, apart from that they have to go if you want to be taken seriously.
What you want to have; are things like artwork, photos of friends and family, certificates and awards, plants and pretty much anything classy, decorative and playa that tells a girl about your achievements and interests in the most tasteful way possible.
Entertainment and sound
When you have a girl back at your place and in your bedroom it’s always good to have some kind of background sound to cut the tension. Whether it be soft music or a movie playing on your TV, tranquil background noise will always help lighten the mood and also let her know that she doesn’t need to be afraid of people listening and can make some noise.
Make sure you have at least a stereo in your room; a television is better but not a necessity. Have a large array of music or DVD’s around for her to choose from. You’re most likely not going to be intently watching or listening to anything it’s just to take away the awkwardness of being alone together in your room.
If you have a gaming system then keep it modest, dance mats and an assorted band of plastic instruments should be kept out of sight. Something small isn’t bad i.e. console, couple of games, a controller are fine as long as it doesn’t look like you spend your life on it.
Make sure you don’t have any fluorescent lights in your room (white lights), girls hate them because it makes their makeup look bad and will bring out their insecurities about how they look naked.
A playa sets the mood just right with dim lights, a lamp light or residual light coming from the television, anything stronger will ruin the mood.
A musical instrument
Girls like it when guys can play a musical instrument; it’s sexy and adds depth to your playa character. You don’t even have to be good at it or even know how to play! Just learn one small tune really well or tell her you just started or will play it for her later.
Guitar is by far the coolest instrument, followed by drums and percussion. If you play the tuber you won’t be doing yourself any favours by bringing it out. Think player Rock star, not loser band geek.
Your playa bed
This is where you want to get your girl because this is where the magic happens, therefore you want to make it as comfortable, inviting and playa as possible.
Not only is the bed the most natural place for women to be propositioned for sex but it is also the focal point of every bedroom. It is even in the name itself bed-room, a room for your bed with everything else surrounding your bed merely there to compliment it.
It would be a foolish mistake to spend all your time doing up the rest of the room without paying any attention whatsoever to the bed itself. You might not think that there is much to a bed, just a mattress and some sheets right?
Wrong. When you consider how often it is used by yourself in relation to all the other furniture in your house, it is actually by far your most important piece of furniture and considering any girl you bring home is going to be spending most of her time there, it’s not something you can afford to overlook as a playa.
Below we have listed the most common things overlooked by men which are most off-putting to women.
If you have a single bed, racing car bed, bunk bed, load it up into a trailer and take it down to the garbage tip because those kinds of beds are nothing more than big wooden lady deterrents.
At the very least you should have a double bed. You’re not a little kid anymore it is time to get a real grownups bed and make your room look like a man’s room. A playa does not take a girl back to a tiny kid size bed, a playa takes a girl back to a throne of lovemaking wide and long enough for him to do all sorts of crazy playa sex acts on.
Big boy beds are relatively cheap and affordable and just think about how nice it will feel to stretch out wide every night your entire body firmly supported by springy cushiony goodness.
Perhaps the most important thing of all for a playa’s bed. No decent girl wants to have sex in a bed that isn’t clean. You should clean your sheets at least once a week to ensure they are fresh. It always pays to make your bed before you go out; it makes your bed look cleaner.
Check your sheets to make sure that there are no signs of other girls having been there recently, check for love juice stains, check for makeup and hair on the pillows; bobby pins and earrings on the nightstand, be fastidious because girls look for these kinds of things.
Make sure there’s no smell, if you have sex with a girl in your bed always change the sheets; it might not smell to you but it can smell to others. Give your pillows and sheets a quick spray with Cologne to hide any residual scent.
No girl with any self pride will want to get into a playa’s bed that appears to be dirty and smelly, don’t take the risk, keep it clean, keep it playa.
Invest in some nice matching sheets and covers, the higher the thread count the more comfortable the material will be on her skin. Don’t get anything with prints on it, only tasteful patterns or plain colours; Leopard skin sheets aren’t really as seductive and playa as some people think.
It’s good to have a lot of pillows so you can sit up with them in bed or when they go to sleep you will both have somewhere comfortable to rest your heads.
If possible try and get some different types of pillows, i.e. some really thin or big and fluffy, one with duck feather etc. It is quite common in this day and age for a lot of men and women to have sensitive necks, if she can find a pillow that suits her then she will have a much more comfortable sleep.
If you don’t have a bedside table then go out and buy one. There are several reasons why having a bedside table is awesome.
First and foremost apart from adding to the Feng Shui of your bedroom you can also keep your playa toys there, like condoms, lubricants and whatever other crazy contraptions you may have picked up at the sex shop.
The longer you spend fumbling around your room for a condom the more likely she is to reconsider having sex with you. A playa always has a plentiful supply of condoms out of sight but conveniently located.
You can also put a bedside lamp on a bedside table, this is a great way to set the mood without having blinding bright lights in her face and yours. When and if you want to turn the light off you only need to reach over and flick the switch and you save yourself awkward fumbling and unwanted injuries getting from the light switch to her and your bed.
Along with your bedside table and your bedside lamp you will also want to have a bedside bin, preferably a closed one where you can put things like used condoms and tissues. There is nothing worse than when you wake up the next morning, get out of bed and step on the congealed rubber evidence of your union from the night before.
Brand new mattresses normally range between the hundreds and the thousands. Unless you have back problems the cheap ones are normally not that bad, as long as they are firm enough to offer support then you should be okay, if you’re unsure then it’s generally better to try before you buy.
The worst thing you can do is get a second hand mattress; what a lot of people don’t realise is that mattresses build up big populations of bed bugs over time and they are really hard to get rid of. So if you and your guest don’t want to be scratching all night you might want to check for this.
Your playa bathroom
If you bring a girl back to your place, it is pretty much guaranteed that she’s going to go to your bathroom to freshen up at some point. If you want her to be delighted rather than disgusted there’s a few little things you as a playa should do to leave the right impression and put her in the right mood.
Buy some dispensable hand soap, no girl wants to wash her hands with some old crusty soap covered in pubic hairs. A lot of girls like to take off some of their makeup at the end of the night so it doesn’t end up all over your pillow so if you have some nice soap they will appreciate it all the more.
Make sure you don’t have any girl stuff in your bathroom. Girls have a tendency to leave items over at guy’s places they stay at. Sometimes they do this on purpose to make an excuse to see the guy again, other times they might just forget. Either way keep an eye out for it because if another girl sees it there for no obvious reason then she will most likely jump to all the wrong conclusions.
Clean your toilet properly at least once a week, make sure there are no shit stains in the bowel or urine and pubic hairs around the rim, girls find this disgusting as they have no choice but to sit on it.
Sink and vanity
Clean your sink and vanity unit regularly as mould tends to bulid up around this area, most guys don’t notice and care about those kind of things but a lot of girls do.
Keep a bin with a lid on it in your bathroom; sometimes girls need to use items whilst freshening up they won’t feel particularly comfortable with guys seeing and won’t flush down your toilet either. It might seem like a small thing but it would make a big difference to their comfort and privacy.
One last important thing is your own attitude and how you carry yourself within your house; it might not be a castle but you should still act like a playa King within it, being comfortable, relaxed and confident in your surroundings so she will be too, in the end this could make all the difference in the success of your seduction.
If you’re interested in discussing this with other Playas then click here!