What does it take to be a player?
The same thing it takes too be anything – hard work and dedication. The term ” player ” has lost a bit of its sentiments because it’s so loosely thrown around. Girls tend to throw the term around to any guy who appears to be attractive. Even worse, guys think that if they can get laid once or twice a month then the term applies to them. However being a player is not just about getting “laid”; its a lifestyle and a path that applies to a minority. Many try to be, many more claim to be, but few actually have what it takes to walk the narrow path. I hope with this article I can restore the value to what being a player is actually all about.
When I decided I was going to be Player, I was eighteen, jobless, and a rebel. I had just got my scholarship revoked to a solid university because I refused to climb off my high horse, and do something I didn’t believe in. So there I was, eighteen, no money, at some bullshit community college. I didn’t take the school serious, I only enrolled because I planned to study, learn from and learn about the opposite sex. I was there to soak up everything I could from approaching and talking to women all over the campus. I didn’t care whether I got rejected by every one of them, I was going to be relentless.
Now don’t get me wrong; i’ve always been able to get a girl since I was a child. Whether it was at the church I was forced to go to or the schools I was forced to go to, I was always able to attract and date the high quality women. I was never the most popular guy; mainly because I ignorantly walked around with too much arrogance to be approachable. But that same arrogance made women curious; it was just the guys who didn’t like me too much.
But anyway, I never felt satisfied with my insignificant success with women because it just wasn’t “easy” enough. I was still chasing these women down and doing most of the work.
I wanted that rockstar like appeal. I wanted women falling into my lap left and right; I wanted groupies.
So I began approaching women on campus, off campus, everywhere I could find them. You see, it wasn’t really about the sex for me. I really did, and still do LOVE women. I love the way the walk, the way they smell, the way they talk, I just can’t stay away from them. They’re amazing; and that’s really the secret to all of this. The more you love women, the more successful you will be with them. Women can pick up on a guy who doesn’t really like women. So if you’re in this just because your “ego” says you need to get laid to feel like a man your case is impossible. You may score a cheap lay every now and then but… well you know how you feel when it’s over.
So I went on approaching women like this for a month and then one day everything changed. I had just finished walking this girl from my math class to her car and I was headed back to campus to figure out what I was going to do on my off time. As soon as I stepped on the campus a voice spoke from behind me..
” You’re too cool huh? ”
It was this guy from my psychology class who I didn’t even recognize until he reminded me that we had class together. I never really paid the guys too much attention; I was too into the girls and.. well.. myself.
We got to talking and I got into bragging about how good I was at getting girls. He would just chuckle and shake his head.
That was me man, young, arrogant, and ignorant; I thought I knew everything.
His name was Joey and I thank God everyday that my path crossed with his. As it turns out, Joey was a pimp – not a guy that’s good with girls- I’m talking about an actual pimp. I hadn’t found out until I saw his new jaguar and began inquisitively asking him questions about what he did. He decided to go to school because he wanted out of the life. He had gone as far as he could go within the pimp world without his conscious eating his soul away, so he was in the process of quitting. Although somethings never change; as I began to get close to joey I noticed that he had a few girls in each class doing all his homework, taking his notes, and providing him with answers to his test. He never spoke about this and I never really asked him about it; I just began to pick up on things. You see Joey was humble and always honest; he preferred you to find out about his accomplishments on your own as apposed to him wearing them as a badge of honor. Which is something I still hold as a value to this day.
Joey had seen me around campus approaching for that entire month, he had also heard me speak to women in the two classes we had together(yea, turns out we had two classes together). He began correcting me and telling me what I was doing wrong. One of the major points he stressed to me was to be honest at all times. ” How can you call yourself a man if you have to lie to women to get them to like you? They’re either going to love you or hate you. There is no tricking a girl into liking you; she likes what she feels, more than what you say. If you’re honest, ambitious, and happy there is very little a woman won’t do to help you reach your goals. Even selling her own self for you. “
Let me also just say that the women that he would “pimp” weren’t some beat up drug addicted women, they weren’t former strippers, or from single parent homes. These were college graduate, highly attractive women that had decent careers. They just loved him so much that they would just do little side work just to make sure he reached his goals. He loved these women, but he just grew up in a position where if he wanted nice things, he had no other way of getting them. Many will think I’m justifying his actions(I’m not.. I know it’s wrong), and others won’t understand, but I don’t care to explain that any further.
After a year of conversation, correcting my approach, and editing my anti-seductive mindsets Joey had taught me everything he knew. I wouldn’t be attending school any more, I knew what I wanted to do. We parted ways and his last words to me were ” you’re ready”. We did our secret handshake, and from the look in his eye I knew we wouldn’t be seeing each for a long time. And we hadn’t, years later we spoke, and I was pleased to here that he finished school, got the job he wanted and was engaged to be married soon. I wasn’t at all surprised, he was a success magnet and always genuine. And you can’t even image the laugh he got when I told him what I was now doing for a living.
So there it goes.. It’s a story I’ve wanted to tell for a while but just wasn’t sure how I would be received once I told it. I’ve grown out of giving a fuck a long time ago so I figured why the hell not. Joey showed me what it meant to be a player, he taught me to never lie no matter what the consequences were, and to always be confident enough to tell a girl exactly what I wanted. Because its never really about what you do; its all about who you are.
I come from a long line of men who have been successful with women, my dad was a player, his dad was a player and so forth, but no one has ever shown me as much about women as Joey did. I never did get to tell him thank you. I didn’t tell anyone thank you back then… So this is my thank you if he ever sees this. Peace & Love
Email me: EddieFews@WayOfThePlayer.com For 1 on 1 coaching or consultation via Skype, phone or IM.