I get a barrage of men emailing me and asking me questions that all reflect what they believe to be an issue with what a woman thinks about them. And I have to remind them of a simple concept that I’m going to share here. Basically, what a woman personally thinks about you isn’t all that important to her. Its probably third or fourth on the list of what she values when it comes to her perception of a man in communication with her. I’ll get into the two things that I know for a fact are above what “she thinks of you” on this list..
1. A woman cares more about what you think of yourself than she cares about what she thinks of you.
Many men don’t directly realize what women are, and how they operate. A woman is there to support whatever a man believes his self image is. If he believe himself to be a king, she will support him by encouraging him to be one and treating him as he is one, but only because this is already his belief. She just becomes the one that amplifies within him that which is already present. On the flip side, if a man believe himself to be uninteresting and unattractive she will support his self imagine again; treating him like he is unattractive and uninteresting. Her general behavior being that which reflects a mans own mentality back to him with her attention and action. Men are quick to begin thinking that they were rejected by a woman because she didn’t find them interesting or attractive, but the truth of the matter is, she didn’t find them interesting or attractive because they themselves don’t find themselves to be interesting or attractive in that moment. This is why the concept of assuming attraction works so well. A man that thinks he is attractive will naturally behave in a more confident manner; thus coming across more attractive; and a man that thinks he is unattractive will naturally behave in a less confident manner; decreasing the confidence in his tonality and the forward projection of his actions. Who’s going to find the man with the weak unconfident tone and approach attractive? This works not only because it causes the man to project himself to be more attractive, but the woman is in turn receiving his projecting and projecting it back to him. For better or for worse.
2. A woman cares more about what you think of her than she does about what she thinks of you.
This is natural because of the basic level of narcissism that exist within all of us. How many people you don’t know have you witnessed embarrass themselves in your entire life? Many i’m sure. Now how many of their faces do you remember? Probably none. As people we’re more likely to remember what we ate for dinner two nights ago than we are what our friends told us they ate for dinner two nights ago, because naturally our lives are more important to us. So as a man approaching a woman you would be a lot more likely to approach with confidence if you had the understanding that she cares more about what you think of HER conversational skills than she does about what she thinks of your conversational skills. The only thing that trumps this is the rule above this one. If the man himself believes that his conversational skills aren’t up to par he will in turn project this and the woman will receive him as a man without great conversational skills. But once that is taken care of, through developing a confident core belief system, she then is more likely to be concerned with what you think of her than she will be with what she thinks of you.
She cares more about what you think of her outfit than she does about what she thinks of your outfit, but she cares more about what you think of your own outfit than she does about what she thinks of your outfit. Your own projection comes first when it comes to relating to a woman in an intimate way. The rules only change if there is no communication or no connection. But while attempting to make one it would be wise for a man to remember these rules.
What you think of you is first, what you think of her is second, and what she thinks of you is third.
A lot of power comes to the man that fully understands this and understand how this helps and increases his ability to attract women.
Now how does a man increase the power of his own belief system and self image? Through mental repetition with thoughts of his desired outcome. A process that I work with men on each and every day. I tell guys all the time, our thoughts become our words, our words become our actions, our actions become our habits, our habits become our character and our character becomes our destiny. Thought creates the emotion, and emotion creates the fuel for action. Control your thoughts and life will naturally take shape around you in the way you desire.
How do you think great actors get into character? Through mentally repeating and convincing themselves that they are and that they possess the characteristics and attributes of the man in the script. The world is your stage, you are the actor, and your ability to win a oscar is all predicated upon how well you convince yourself and belief that you already are that which you want to be. Depending on where you want to be this process can take any where from 3 months to a year of consistency, and it will all have been worth it once your time has come. Control your thoughts or they’ll control you. All planted seeds will be reaped when its time for harvest whether on purpose or accidentally.
Thanks for reading.
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